Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Tuesday, February 18, 2014

happy birthday to me... why the fuck am I still alive?

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Thank you...

Here's one for the "Faith in Humanity Restored" file... I was recently forced to leave the place where I lived due to some personal issues and my inability to find work and wound up in a homeless shelter, and will most likely be in one for at least the next few months. After announcing this fact to the people of Rainbow Dash Network (http://rainbowdash.net/), a site I help moderate, these people, who are, for all intents and purposes, strangers to me, took it upon themselves to help me to the best of their abilities. With donations, advice, moral support, sending me little odds and ends I may need, and trying to help get me out of the bleak moods my situation gets me into quite often, they've done their level best to help me get back on my feet again. This site, full of complete strangers, gives more of a damn about me than the person I spent the last 12+ years of my life with... I lack the words to adequately express my gratitude to each and every one of them, they're just about the only thing that's getting me through a rather dark time in my life and I will be eternally thankful to them all. I've promised to pay them all back despite their protests to the contrary and I full intend to do so no matter how long it takes me. I just wanted to get this said, though it's a meager payment for all they've done and continue to do for me...

Friday, May 10, 2013

Well now...

Hello my little chitterlings, your beloved Baron has himself a new toy...

I've recently acquired (through means best left unexplained) a tablet to play with so, with any, luck I may start posting my random brain dribblings again since this thing makes it a bit easier to do when the mood takes me.

This thing appears to be capable of taking dictation as well... maybe I can finally get some of my rants down as text.

Time will tell...

Till then I'd best start blowing some of the dust off this tired old place and seeing if those reactors are still up to snuff... looks like someone was swimming in the coolant tanks again.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Signs of life...

Somewhere in the dim recesses of an old abandoned factory floor a light snaps on, flickering fitfully for a moment before giving a low steady gleam...

In that yellow glimmer a figure can be seen moving about rummaging through tool boxes and bins, shifting the collected debris off various work benches, keeping things that would be useful and tossing the rest, working through the tasks one would expect of someone getting ready to do a job...

Time passes...

Work appears to be progressing, more lights are lit, casting their yellow/white glare over part of the factory floor, some of the machinery has been taken apart, pieces strewn over the various workbenches and sections of the floor, from somewhere in the back the sound of hammering rings out, the clatter of something metallic being dropped onto the cement floor, the squeal of rusted metal being coaxed into being cooperative, and, of all things, the sound of someone quietly whistling "Winter Wrap Up"...

Saturday, January 29, 2011

I got nothing.

I think it's safe to assume that, for the foreseeable future, I'm not going to be posting anything.

Not that it really matters much anyway, aside from people looking for a certain movie or stumbling across it by accident, no one even bothers looking at this mess, myself included.

I'm sure that, at some point, I may get the urge to try to be funny again, or try to relate a story that may or may not have actually happened, or impart some wisdom of dubious pedigree, or something, but for now... I got nothing.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

From the files of the Black Baron: Casefile #101225 - Lesser Barons

Since search engines tend to bring folks here looking for other items sharing my title, so I decided, in my infinite wisdom, to post links to a few others that share my title... if not my infamy.

Michael Wittmann, German tank commander during World War 2.

Robert Munro, 18th Baron of Foulis in Scotland.

18th Aviation Brigade of the United States Army. (inactive)

The Birmingham Black Barons, professional Negro League baseball team from 1920 to 1960.

Brabus E V12 Black Baron, modified 2010 E-Class Mercedes Benz.

Red Army March - White Army, Black Baron performed by the Red Army Choir.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Technical Difficulties

Due to financial circumstances beyond our control we've already lost our phone & TV, and we will most likely be without internet access for the foreseeable future starting either tuesday (10/16) or wednesday (10/17).

I'll try to get someplace I can check my e-mail when time allows, so if you write to me don't expect an instantaneous reply.

I'm hoping this will be a temporary setback but barring a windfall this will be it for at least a few weeks.

Update (11/23/10): Not much to say at this point, things haven't improved any and don't look to be changing any time soon.

Its safe to say at this point that I hate my life. 

Update (11/24/10): Thanks to the timely aid of a very good friend I'm back, larger than life and twice as ugly... but I do still hate my life.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

All right you primitive screwheads, listen up!

This is a heads-up from your beloved Baron!

On Sunday November 7 at 8:00 pm ET, Turner Classic Movies will be showing the recently refound and restored version of Metropolis, having restored to the film much of what had been lost earlier in the 20th century due to ham-handed executive meddling.

So, if you're a fan of the great grand-daddy of modern science fiction you'll be there on November 7th with popcorn in hand.


Metropolis - The Restoration

Metropolis Refound

Be there, or else.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

And Now For Something Completely Different.

Since absolutely no one has asked for it, but it is mentioned in the banner, I give you...

...an exploding frog!

Monday, August 30, 2010

The Black Baron's Random Fact of the Unspecified Time Period - #33

In California it is against the law for any vehicle without a driver to exceed 60 miles per hour.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Hey look, something not entirely unlike a blog post!

I'm not dead yet, just give me a bit to whomp up something that's actually readable and not liberally laced with profanity and random keyboard bashings.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Sunday, June 27, 2010

The Black Baron's Random Fact of the Unspecified Time Period - #32

The Eisenhower interstate system requires that 1 mile in every 5 must be straight.

These straight sections are usable as airstrips in emergency situations.

Monday, June 14, 2010

The last thing I remember...

...is screaming...

...and I'm not sure who it was.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

From the files of the Black Baron: Casefile #100529 - "Service... what's that?"

This will be a short post since I'm still having trouble believing it myself.

Just a bit of setup before the payoff...

The lab assistant and myself ventured forth to a local eatery called "McCobb's" that specializes in various sorts of deep-fried comestibles and a uniquely New Jersey invention called a Texas Wiener, of which the lab assistant wanted to get herself a couple of with onion rings and for myself I just wanted some fish & chips.

Upon arriving at the establishment we perused the menu to make sure our original choices were what we wanted before making our way to the counter to place the order where this exchange took place...

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Andy Rooney said it...

And I agree with it wholeheartedly...

"I don't think being a minority makes you a victim of anything except numbers. The only things I can think of that are truly discriminatory are things like the United Negro College Fund, Jet Magazine, Black Entertainment Television, and Miss Black America. Try to have things like the United Caucasian College Fund, Cloud Magazine, White Entertainment Television, or Miss White America; and see what happens... Jesse Jackson will be knocking down your door.

Guns do not make you a killer. I think killing makes you a killer. You can kill someone with a baseball bat or a car, but no one is trying to ban you from driving to the ball game.

I believe they are called the Boy Scouts for a reason, which is why there are no girls allowed. Girls belong in the Girl Scouts! ARE YOU LISTENING MARTHA BURKE?

I think that if you feel homosexuality is wrong, it is not a phobia, it is an opinion.

I have the right 'NOT' to be tolerant of others because they are different, weird, or tick me off.

When 70% of the people who get arrested are black, in cities where 70% of the population is black, that is not racial profiling; it is the Law of Probability.

I believe that if you are selling me a milkshake, a pack of cigarettes, a newspaper or a hotel room, you must do it in English! As a matter of fact, if you want to be an American citizen, you should have to speak English!

My father and grandfather didn't die in vain so you can leave the countries you were born in to come over and disrespect ours.

I think the police should have every right to shoot you if you threaten them after they tell you to stop. If you can't understand the word 'freeze' or 'stop' in English, see the above lines...

I don't think just because you were not born in this country, you are qualified for any special loan programs, government sponsored bank loans or tax breaks, etc., so you can open a hotel, coffee shop, trinket store, or any other business.

We did not go to the aid of certain foreign countries and risk our lives in wars to defend their freedoms, so that decades later they could come over here and tell us our constitution is a living document and open to their interpretations.

I don't hate the rich; I don't pity the poor.

I know pro wrestling is fake, but so are movies and television. That doesn't stop you from watching them.

I think Bill Gates has every right to keep every penny he made and continue to make more. If it ticks you off, go and invent the next operating system that's better, and put your name on the building.

It doesn't take a whole village to raise a child right, but it does take a parent to stand up to the kid and say 'NO!' when necessary.

I think tattoos and piercings are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. And, please, stay home until that new lip ring heals. I don't want to look at your ugly infected mouth as you serve me French fries!

I am sick of "Political Correctness". I know a lot of black people, and not a single one of them was born in Africa, so how can they be "African-Americans"? Besides, Africa is a continent. I don't go around saying I am a European-American because my great, great, great, great, great, great grandfather was
from Europe. I am proud to be from America and nowhere else.

And if you don't like my point of view, tough..."

Couldn't have put it any better myself.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Ummm... Yeah...

Just pretend I posted something witty & sarcastic here...

I'll think of something later.