Monday, March 3, 2008

Too much caffeine + Not enough sleep = Implosion

You know, when I first started this thing I decided that I wasn't going to do what I'd seen on a lot of other blogs... all the complaining and prattling on and on about how bad their lot in life is.

Much to my chagrin I found that if I removed that from the list of available subjects I didn't have a whole hell of a lot to talk about...

On a similar note, over on Tarik Saleh's blog, Moscaline, I took what amounts to a dump all over it... I should like to apologize to him for that.

I know that I could easily delete what I posted but if this was a verbal conversation I wouldn't have that luxury so I don't see why I should cheat my way out of it by hitting delete.

It just seems like I more easily loose what was already a tenuous grasp on my sense and sanity these days.

I do my best to try to believe it when they say that things are fine and there's nothing to worry about... I fail miserably but I do try.

As it stands, if it wasn't for the good will of one or two people I'd most likely be living in a refrigerator box right now and it's just out of sheer bloodymindedness that I haven't decided to snuff myself... not that I haven't considered it, but when I realized how many folks might be glad I did it, I crossed that off the list as an option ages ago and just to be a bastard decided that I was never going to die.

I suppose if there was a point to all this it would be just to get it on the record that I am trying, I'm out there looking, pasting on my best fake smile while trying to convince whomever is doing the interview that I wont kill him or rob his business blind.

Contrary to popular opinion, I would like to work and pay my own way... I'd rather not spend all my time looking at the same four walls of this apartment and get out and bloody well do something...

Ok... I'm really rambling now, this is what you get when you listen to some loon on the internet at 2am, a screen full of gibberish and the ravings of a sleep-deprived mind.

I'm gonna go pretend to sleep now and maybe, with a bit of luck, I can fake being coherent tomorrow... but don't get your hopes up.

And I'll bet you wondered why they call me Madd Marrock...

Later taters.


  1. It doesn't matter how madd or loony you are MarMar, I still love you.

    Your Junebug

  2. No biggie really, let me know if you want the post deleted. Either way is OK.

    Good luck pal.